Seven years ago today, Richard and I started our parenthood journey. About this time exactly, we were heading to the hospital. It would be another 16 hours before Connor arrived, and our lives have never been the same (and Connor is still pretty darn stubborn). Happy Birthday Connor!

It’s been a long week, and it’s only Thursday.  This week includes two soccer pizza parties, one parent-teacher conference, one Cub Scout meeting, one baby shower for TD2′s teachers (yes, that’s supposed to be plural) and three soccer games (TD1 has two on Saturday.)  Plus, the costume for TD1′s Christmas Pageant is due TOMORROW (why three weeks in advance, I don’t know, but it is).  So, after tonight’s soccer pizza party, having forgotten all about the costume thing, MM and I discussed and agreed that the best plan was to get TD1 showered, and put TD2 and TD3 in my bathtub for a joint bath.  They’ve done it before (earlier this week, and once or twice before that) and generally have a good time.  TD1 decided he wanted to shower and go read quietly for a while by himself, so MM took care of that.  He stuck around until he made sure I had everything I needed for TD2 and TD3 and that they were in the bathtub, and then headed to a store not-to-be-named to pick up the costume supplies.

I went to TD1/TD2′s bedroom to check on TD1.  We chatted for a while, and I decided it was about time to pull TD2 and TD3 out of the bathtub.  So I headed back to my bathroom, turned the corner just in time to see TD3 standing in the tub with poop emanating from the appropriate orafice.  Horrified, I immediately get TD2 out of the tub (it’s a raised oval tub, and he’s too little to get out on his own).  I get him out, turn around and see TD3 trying to grab the poop, and, unsuccessful, looks at me, holds his hands up and says “Yucky.”  Short of bursting out laughing, I call to TD1 to please come down from his bunk because I’m going to need his help.  I direct TD1 to take TD2 to the other bathroom, while I follow with TD3 wrapped in a towel.  I get the shower going for TD2 (“Why do I need to take a shower too?”  Me: “Because poop has germs and it’s gross and no child of mine is going to bed with poop on him.”)  I asked TD1 to help TD2 in the shower while I make sure TD3 is contained.  Again, I turn around to find TD1 pouring shampoo directly on TD2′s head (about five times more than he needs) and telling him “Ok, now go rinse it out.”  Deciding this is a bad arrangement, I set TD1 to entertain TD3, and rinse out the shampoo from TD2′s hair, scrub him down again and get him out.

After making sure that TD2 is in his bedroom, I turn to TD3 and get him started with a new fast washing.  I get him washed and out and wrapped in his (somewhat soggy) towel, and as I pass TD1/TD2′s room, I hear “They’re stuck!  Mommy, can you help us?”  I glance in, and TD1 is sitting on the floor helping TD2 get his underwear on.  TD2 is standing up, and has managed to get the elastic rolled so that his underwear is inside out.  Me: “I can’t, I need to get TD3 down to bed.”  I assume they figured it out, since after I read stories to TD3, I went to their room where TD1 was reading a bedtime story to TD2.

Lessons Learned: 1.  TD3 eats beans at school.  2.  TD1 can be very, very useful.  3.  TD2 thinks poop is gross.  4.  When everything can go wrong, it does.  5.  Never leave an unopened bottle of wine unattended when these things happen at my house.  Sorry MM, I’m starting without you tonight.  And the costume isn’t even done yet.

TD3 has taken to beating us with books and saying “READ!” Fortunately, when we are tired of the abuse, we can now send him to TD1, who will happily read lots and lots of books to him. It’s sibling bonding, right?

Last week TD1′s and TD2′s soccer games were close in time, so the entire day wasn’t devoted to going to and coming from soccer.  We were actually back at the house with soccer over and done by about noon, which meant everyone could take naps and rest after the busy morning.  Except that TD3 (age almost-2) didn’t want to take a nap, so he was wide awake for a very long time.  He had books, stuffed animals and blankets in his crib.  Well, he was bored, despite the plethora of things to play with in his crib.  Finally, over the baby monitor, it was silent in his room.

Two hours later (or so) we opened the door.  As we looked into TD3′s room, a sinking feeling came over us.  First, we sniffed to make sure nothing truly untoward had occurred.  The light from the hallway showed a cute little boy… completely naked, including his diaper. Bear in mind, to get completely naked, he figured out how to get his shirt off over his head (which TD1 and TD2 still sometimes have issues with), how to pull off his shorts, and then, to our mortification, he figured out how to take off his diaper.  When we woke him up, he rolled over, and giggled at us.  Typical.

Fortunately, it was a warm day and he was slightly dehydrated so there was no mess to clean up.  But next time we might not be so lucky.

MM is out running errands while the boys enjoy a “do nothing” day.  The boys are playing nicely together (a big change from yesterday), and I asked TD2 to put one of his toys in his room because TD3 already broke the same toy and we replaced it.  TD2, in an abundance of caution, decided he really didn’t want TD3 getting into their room (TD1 and TD2 share a room).  So he locked it.  From the inside.  We have the developer’s “key” to get into the doors, but I’ve never been able to use them… they take wiggling and jiggling to get the lock to unlock.  So, TD1 and TD2 are locked out of their room until MM gets home.  I guess that’s what TD2 gets for being “clever.”

Granma and Granpaa are here, and MM was nice enough to let me sleep in for a couple of hours this morning.  So, while he was getting dressed, I asked TD2 to get dressed as well.  In the meantime, I helped TD1 clean up the Play Doh he had been playing with in the dining room.  It was taking a really long time for TD2 to get dressed, to I asked TD1 to go check on him.  TD3 decided to go instead.  As I was following TD3 down the hall, I heard “Miam Nakey!!!”  At least TD2 was halfway to being dressed!!!

7 days:

Approximately 1500 miles on the Suburban.

Average MPG: 17.5

81.5 gallons of gas

San Diego Attractions visited: 2

Grandparents seen: 4

Tired boys: 2

Fields peed in (sometimes it’s really good to have boys): 1

Family members happy to all be in one place again: 5

TD1, TD2 and I left for a week with the sole purpose of having a good time.  Saturday was a travel day, filled with lots of movies in the car and swimming when we finally arrived at Granma and Granpa’s house.  Granma, Granpa and I saw a play in Prospect Park with Granma’s cousins and had a great time.  Sunday was a “rest day” filled with swimming, resting, swimming, movies, swimming and sleep.  Monday was “go to San Diego day”, except the hotel check in time wasn’t until 3.  So Monday also became “see that saccharin sweet movie I was trying to avoid all summer” day.  Fortunately, “The Smurfs” wasn’t as bad as I anticipated, and both boys loved it.  Afterwards, we headed for San Diego with Granpa to meet up with Nana&Granpa.  After an uneventful dinner, Granpa of Nana&Granpa took the boys swimming at the hotel while I made the run to the grocery store for breakfast and snack stuff.  Finally, after some FaceTime with MM adn a viewing of “The Gruffalo” on the iPad, the boys went to sleep.

The next morning at 6:30 a.m., TD1 was awake again and ready to go.  After convincing him that it really was too early for him to be awake and that Sea World wasn’t even open yet, he consented to play on the iPad until it was time to leave.  Eventually, TD2 woke up, breakfast was had in the room (Nana&Granpa found a hotel that had rooms that had bunk beds and a kitchenette, so life was much easier: thanks Nana&Granpa!) and we headed out at 8:45 a.m.

Sea World was fantastic!  Thanks to my friend Mike, it was practically free to get in, which made it that much better!  I’m not sure the boys were convinced when I explained that really, if you sit in the rows labeled “Soak Zone,” they would end up soaked.  The dolphin and whale show was first on the agenda, and they sat in row six.  Since they are too young to be left by themselves (and Granpa and Nana&Granpa opted to sit higher in the stadium), I sat with them.  TD1 was fortunate to have someone sitting in front of him.  TD2 and I were less fortunate.  When the first splash hit, TD2 burst into tears because he was, somewhat predictably, soaking wet.  The nice lady in front of TD1 told him to crouch down behind her next time, and he did.  After that, it was the new turtle exhibit, the shark exhibit, lunch, a Shamu show (can’t go to Sea World without seeing Shamu), most of the other attractions and the obligatory stop in the gift shop.  The favorite attraction?  The “4D Elmo show” complete with water splashes and 3D glasses for TD2, and the Sea Lion show for TD1.  We left at around 5 p.m.  Dinner at the hotel diner was just as good the second night, and the boys slept soundly again that night.

Despite the busy day, they were awake at 7 a.m. again the next morning, ready to go to the World Famous San Diego Zoo.  I managed to roll out of bed and find the Disney channel to distract them while I showered and packed up everything from the last two days.  We weren’t at the zoo when it opened, but we made up for it by not leaving until after 6 p.m.  I think we saw almost everything there.  The main attraction for the boys was the polar bear exhibit.  Second in line was the Skyfari.  Granpa and Granpa sat out the last hour and a half, and I couldn’t be more grateful to Nana for going with me to see the last part of the zoo.  We were there most of the day and hadn’t seen the monkeys, tigers or hippos by 4 p.m.  I checked the map and realized it was kind of a lot left to see.  So, Granpa and Granpa stayed at the Cantina, and the four of us set off to see what was left.  We returned almost two hours later, to find Granpa and Granpa waiting for us, after having “bought each other” a beer.  After saying good-bye to Nana&Granpa, I packed TD1, TD2 and Granpa into the car and headed back to Redlands.  The next day was another “rest” day (they only went in the pool twice) and Granma was home with us as well.

Friday was sailing day.  Granpa has a sailboat, and offered to take us all sailing with his friend.  The boys were really excited, at first.  Then they realized they were going to be on the boat, away from land, for a few hours.  That kind of freaked them out for a while.  Eventually, TD2 calmed down and fell asleep (while sitting on my lap, which he refused to leave).  Even more fun was the fact that I managed to get a seasick headache about halfway through the trip.  Once we were back on land, I explained to the boys what was going on, and they were remarkably understanding.

The next morning, we headed back home.  Everyone was happy, and we enjoyed our trip.  Most importantly, we managed to get out of the area for an entire week, saw lots of fun stuff, and I didn’t go completely insane in the process.  Thank you to Granma, Granpa and Nana and Granpa for hosting and helping with the boys.  Thanks to Mike for the Sea World insider’s view and tickets.

Unfortunately, MM did not have nearly as much fun while we were gone.  TD3 managed to get a stomach bug and was temporarily named “Vomit Boy.”  Everyone seems to be recovering from everything nicely now, though.

TD3 knows 19 of 26 letters!

So, I was in the kitchen making dinner (no, really, I was… it happens sometimes) and I hear TD1 say what would usually be an unauthorized word in our house.  And then I started listening to the context.  TD1 and TD2 were watching the original Superman cartoons, and the subject was flooding and the purpose of a dam.  Needless to say, Superman saved the day and plugged the hole in the dam before it flooded the city.  And I had a moment of relief when I figured out what TD1 was actually talking about.

Every night, before MM and I go to bed, we make sure to check on the boys, just to make sure they’re asleep in their beds.  (Don’t laugh… we once walked in and TD2 was asleep on the floor.)  Anyway, we’ve also been making an effort to go to bed earlier and generally be healthier.  The trouble sometimes comes when the days are MUCH longer and it’s harder for TD1 and TD2 to fall asleep (their window faces west).  Anyway, last night, we went in to check on TD1 and TD2.  As we walked in, TD2 opened his eyes (it was 9 p.m., and he should have been asleep).

Me:  Hi… why are you still awake?

TD2 (Rather groggily):  I’m not.