It’s been a long week, and it’s only Thursday.  This week includes two soccer pizza parties, one parent-teacher conference, one Cub Scout meeting, one baby shower for TD2′s teachers (yes, that’s supposed to be plural) and three soccer games (TD1 has two on Saturday.)  Plus, the costume for TD1′s Christmas Pageant is due TOMORROW (why three weeks in advance, I don’t know, but it is).  So, after tonight’s soccer pizza party, having forgotten all about the costume thing, MM and I discussed and agreed that the best plan was to get TD1 showered, and put TD2 and TD3 in my bathtub for a joint bath.  They’ve done it before (earlier this week, and once or twice before that) and generally have a good time.  TD1 decided he wanted to shower and go read quietly for a while by himself, so MM took care of that.  He stuck around until he made sure I had everything I needed for TD2 and TD3 and that they were in the bathtub, and then headed to a store not-to-be-named to pick up the costume supplies.

I went to TD1/TD2′s bedroom to check on TD1.  We chatted for a while, and I decided it was about time to pull TD2 and TD3 out of the bathtub.  So I headed back to my bathroom, turned the corner just in time to see TD3 standing in the tub with poop emanating from the appropriate orafice.  Horrified, I immediately get TD2 out of the tub (it’s a raised oval tub, and he’s too little to get out on his own).  I get him out, turn around and see TD3 trying to grab the poop, and, unsuccessful, looks at me, holds his hands up and says “Yucky.”  Short of bursting out laughing, I call to TD1 to please come down from his bunk because I’m going to need his help.  I direct TD1 to take TD2 to the other bathroom, while I follow with TD3 wrapped in a towel.  I get the shower going for TD2 (“Why do I need to take a shower too?”  Me: “Because poop has germs and it’s gross and no child of mine is going to bed with poop on him.”)  I asked TD1 to help TD2 in the shower while I make sure TD3 is contained.  Again, I turn around to find TD1 pouring shampoo directly on TD2′s head (about five times more than he needs) and telling him “Ok, now go rinse it out.”  Deciding this is a bad arrangement, I set TD1 to entertain TD3, and rinse out the shampoo from TD2′s hair, scrub him down again and get him out.

After making sure that TD2 is in his bedroom, I turn to TD3 and get him started with a new fast washing.  I get him washed and out and wrapped in his (somewhat soggy) towel, and as I pass TD1/TD2′s room, I hear “They’re stuck!  Mommy, can you help us?”  I glance in, and TD1 is sitting on the floor helping TD2 get his underwear on.  TD2 is standing up, and has managed to get the elastic rolled so that his underwear is inside out.  Me: “I can’t, I need to get TD3 down to bed.”  I assume they figured it out, since after I read stories to TD3, I went to their room where TD1 was reading a bedtime story to TD2.

Lessons Learned: 1.  TD3 eats beans at school.  2.  TD1 can be very, very useful.  3.  TD2 thinks poop is gross.  4.  When everything can go wrong, it does.  5.  Never leave an unopened bottle of wine unattended when these things happen at my house.  Sorry MM, I’m starting without you tonight.  And the costume isn’t even done yet.